If you have nothing nice to say, Don't say anything at all. :)

If you got a buck, you should Spend it on food. Duh.

She may be dumb, but she is not stupid.

She has a million things to say but has writer's block most of the time.




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Hello people,
My name is Su-Yen.
Or I could also be Yennie or Yen.
I am seventeen going on a hundred.
I like long walks and country sides.
I like the smell of rain and trees.
This is my blog, Though I'm not sure what it's actually for.
Maybe I want attention. Like yay! x)
No seriously, maybe I do.

Where, personally I feel like I have so much to say but can't write it in words. I'm in a deep thinking mood so prepare to be bombarded with thoughts. =)

You know, writting my entries for blogs have always been a bit hard for me. Remember what i said about having so many things to blog about, but can't possibly write them down? Yeah well, I think I've realised why. Because sometimes, I'm so occupied with how I would sound when I write this or that, that I in the end leave my mind in a mess of thoughts, their ready to come spilling out, but the thing is, HOW would I sound if i did?

Thoughts are like raw ores of jewels, their innitially beautiful inside, but when you dig it up and try to pollish it and make it into things that appeal to you, it looses its originality and occasionally it's sparkle. Some bits get chipped off in the process of cutting and shaping, and in the en your left with a refined jewel, but to the price of a few bits a chips missing from the original.
OR
you could end up with something ugly and spoilt, because you can't make up your mind on what to do with your ore
OR
you won't even bother to shape it at all, because all the refining is too much work and far too much trouble. This is when you get confused, and your thoughts end up in knots.


So, I'm going to be blatantly honest today. :D No reshaping my sentences to make me sound simpler or sophisticated. Because the truth is, I do think alot. And sometimes a bit too much for my own good.

I'm just back from reading Keith's blog. Initially, I was going to be traditional. Read cbox comments, reply, and go to sleep. But after that little visit, I'm suddenly so inspired to say what I mean. Because I think what He's said is really downright honest and totally genuine. It's like the raw ore put up for display.


*drum roll please*


Alot of people think this is a religious driven post full of bombastic words like 'ressurection' and 'crucification' and well you get it lah. I can't blame you, because the world has a strict first impression on it. Sort of like, sunsets.- romance and victoria's secret.-sexy.
BUT
What if the sunset were happening in the middle of a war? It can't be romantic amidst all the blood and screams right? and who said sunsets only appear for lovey-dovey couples kissing along a sandy beach?
or
Victoria Secret underwear on an old grandma (no offence to them) bless them! :) But seriously, deffinately not sexy right? ._.

So yeah. wow, I don't know actually. I'd love to say that Jesus is the most important thing in my life, but honestly I don't think Its been like that. I've known him for so long, and he's been my best friend. Scratch that, I don't even think I'm worthy of sayin that. That's what I tell myself sometimes, and I know it's wrong. Because he always forgives us no matter how many times we've drifted.

Jesus is the only person I can put my trust in completely. I tell him how I feel about anything, sort of like an imaginary friend who isn't imaginary. and he's thought me that placing too much trust in earthly things will only lead to dissapointment.

Reading through Keith's blog, I've als came to realise one thing too.
Quote:

"Jesus is like my food. I love to eat as you all know, and I totally enjoy searching for things that flatter my taste buds. One day as I was fasting, I realized how much I loved food, almost more than Jesus sadly to say."

It's taken this sentence for me to realise that in many times or rather, I've loved my computer and my friends and things like that more than Jesus. Sometimes you can just get so tied up in so many things, involved in so many relationships in general, and you forget yourself for a while. In my case I'll get sad or upset about something, and forget that the real purpose in life for me is to find myself and ultimately please Him in everything whatever I may do in the future.

I honestly think it's very sad people think of church and chritianity as a cage. Heck, even I feel it too sometimes. It's like you really relaly really want to try or do something, but you know is wrong. Then you start blaming God for your fustration because you didn't get to do this and that. Most people don't want to give that free spirited part of their life up, and that's why Jesus takes a slam.

But, We forget one thing. and I constantly tell myself this everytime i find myself in that situation. Jesus is on OUR side. He wants us to be successfull, to be loved, and he wants everything good in life for you. Which is why he is the heavenly father. A dad only wants what's good for his son/daughter right? so in that same contacts, even though some of the rules Jesus has laid down for us are tight, he only wants what's best for us. And even more so, because our normal dad's can blunder and make mistakes, but God's advice and rules are perfect and are never wrong.

Question?
If someone pointed a gun to your head, and asked if you believed in Jesus, would you say no or keep your faith?

I'd like to believe I'll let whoever the guy is shoot me. Because i know deep down in my gut, I love Jesus more than life, even though I may put things before him. All the small things you do lead you to your final decision, but its the overall faith and loyalty that really matters. I know I can be pretty far away sometimes, but the fact is, I know down in my gut I do believe. And I'll die for it. Even now I'm a little skeptical, and it's true, decisions like that can't be made on the spot, they have to be built in a lifetime. If you've never really thought about it, then maybe it's time.

So ultimately, Jesus is just my rock. and literally too. He's there through thick and thin, and even though you get a tattoo, join a cult, start your own religion or whatever you do, he's always watching. Even when you're in the mother of all messes, He'll still be watching, because he'll never leave or forsake you.

And you know what? In the brink of all this, He's helped me let go of so many negative feelings in my life. Negative feelings are like toxic. They gather up and eventually poison you from the inside ruining everything in your life you think matters. And I am honestly very thankfull for him for that reason. The truth is, would most deffinately NOT be the same person I am today, if it were not for him. Credits to Jesus! =)

And now I tag...

XiaoYun babeh, XianWei, Grace, Josh, Jo, Shammie